In middle school I had my fair share of 'friend problems', particularly in year six. I went around with a reasonably large group of girls at the time and there were countless disagreements and fall outs each week. But there is one particular 'fall out' that I will always remember. It was a lunchtime - it must have been during the summer term because everybody was out on the field and I was looking for my group of friends there. I saw them, but they must have seen me first because they were already walking towards me. By the time they reached me I knew something wasn't quite right because they'd all gathered behind one of my so called 'friends', which was obviously planned and by this point I knew what was coming because I too had been in that group, standing behind a person. It was that day my 'friends' told me they no longer liked me and said they didn't want me to even speak to any of them, apparently I was too much of a nerd or whatever their lame excuse was. I can't remember what I said, I think I managed to mumble an 'Okay' before walking away. Needless to say I was upset. There are certain things you prepare yourself for but that definitely wasn't one of them. Looking back now however, I realise I never fitted in with that group of people very well. I can't believe I actually put up with constantly sitting by myself in lessons and the endless 'ditching' as they called it.
But why am I telling you this story from years ago? Well, there is a good reason. As a result of being pushed out of the group I went on to make some of my best friends, which I'm still friends with today, of course there were other mishaps on the way but there you go. The point I really want to make is sometimes you can feel most alone even when you're surrounded by people - especially if they are people you don't really fit in with. After what happened I didn't care about being 'popular' or liked by lots of people anymore because I'd realised that one of the things that came along with being in a group of 'popular' girls is that you start to lose who you are - when other people got pushed out of the group I didn't speak out and disagree with them, I just let it happen. Perhaps it's cliche but sometimes the things that are 'cliche' are the things that hold the most truth.
I think friends are always going to go through bad parts, maybe even fall outs but now I always remember that the people who are friends with me today like me for who I am. They don't care that I might not being the best looking person or the most liked person and I'm forever thankful for that.
Laura.
Song:Thorns by Charlie Simpson
